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danisup:

fishingboatproceeds:

edwardspoonhands:

53 Terrible Jokes in Under 4 Minutes

Best Joke Video Ever.

Hank did not use my favorite, though: What’s the difference between a novelist and a large pepperoni pizza? A large pepperoni pizza can feed a family of four.

JOHN OMG

(Source: dftbaexpressions, via thenamelessone)

overlypolitebisexual:

cat people: dogs are cool too
dog people: cats don’t feel love did you know a cat once MURDERED my MOTHER

(via mylokiismine)

(Source: best-of-memes, via mylokiismine)

makemysoulache:

Shots fired

makemysoulache:

Shots fired

(via arii-t)

jerkidiot:

wlovepierce:

jerkidiot:

sonnyforpresident:

jerkidiot:

jerkidiot:

IM A TEENAGER I WANNA BE DANGEROUS I WANNA DO SOMETHING CRAZY I WANNA GO STEAL A TRAFFIC LIGHT

REBELLION

image

AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO THOUGHT TRAFFIC LIGHTS WERE A LOT SMALLER

YOU THINK THAT’S BIG?? CHECK OUT THIS STOP SIGN I JUST GRABBED

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STOP STEALING ROAD NAVIGATIONAL ESSENTIALS.

NO

(via arii-t)

imperfectcas:

I have a new favorite thing 

image

and

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its

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called

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M2

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look at these dorks

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(via thenamelessone)

gvnkin:

botanize:

one more sandwich story when i was six my mum made me ham sandwiches and my friend had skin that was the same colour as ham and i’d feel bad eating it because it felt like i was eating her and i’d always leave over my sandwiches and my mum asked why and i was too embarassed to tell her the real reason so i told her i was vegetarian like my dad and to make that lie consistent ive been vegetarian for the past  almost 13 years 

Jesus Christ

(Source: ifyoureadingthis50centiloveu1995, via mylokiismine)

jackstroubleinatanktop:

cj-sewers:

It blows my mind that after all this time you’ve spent on earth, nobody ever bothered to tell you that your eyes aren’t fucking brown.

They are copper against honey and sage and when they water they glow, two perfect orbs the same shade as nature after it rains.


You’re not as simple as they wanted you to be.

image

(Source: siouxerz, via mylokiismine)

pocket-ferret:

a moment of silence for all the little girls this halloween who had to be anna because their older sister wanted to be elsa

(via mylokiismine)

funnyfacesplace:

angergirl:

AU CONTRAIRE
MY GRANDMA GOT ALL A’S IN “ETIQUETTE” (YES THAT WAS AN ACTUAL CLASS IN HER HIGH SCHOOL) AND SHE TOLD ME, “DEAR,” SHE SAID,
“YOU NEVER CROSS YOUR LEGS, YOU CROSS YOUR ANKLES. BUT THE GREAT THING ABOUT YOU LIVING IN THIS GENERATION IS YOU DON’T HAVE TO FOLLOW MY GENERATION’S RULES. SIT THE WAY YOU WANT. IF SOMEONE LOOKS UP YOUR SKIRT, JUST TELL THEM YOUR AUNT MARY WILL KILL THEM.”WHICH IS TRUE
MY AUNT MARY HAD A SWITCHBLADE IN A SPECIAL POCKET OF HER NIGHTGOWN UNTIL THE DAY SHE DIED
the moral of this story is
1. Sit the way you want.
2. My great aunt Mary was a fucking badass.

Aunt Mary is my new hero

funnyfacesplace:

angergirl:

AU CONTRAIRE

MY GRANDMA GOT ALL A’S IN “ETIQUETTE” (YES THAT WAS AN ACTUAL CLASS IN HER HIGH SCHOOL) AND SHE TOLD ME, “DEAR,” SHE SAID,


YOU NEVER CROSS YOUR LEGS, YOU CROSS YOUR ANKLES. BUT THE GREAT THING ABOUT YOU LIVING IN THIS GENERATION IS YOU DON’T HAVE TO FOLLOW MY GENERATION’S RULES. SIT THE WAY YOU WANT. IF SOMEONE LOOKS UP YOUR SKIRT, JUST TELL THEM YOUR AUNT MARY WILL KILL THEM.

WHICH IS TRUE

MY AUNT MARY HAD A SWITCHBLADE IN A SPECIAL POCKET OF HER NIGHTGOWN UNTIL THE DAY SHE DIED

the moral of this story is

1. Sit the way you want.

2. My great aunt Mary was a fucking badass.

Aunt Mary is my new hero

(via mylokiismine)

enemy-stand:

ahlazers:

you know how much pressure there is on girls to be good at every video game they play, because if they fuck up once there’s going to be a heck of a lot of people saying how girls suck and how they shouldn’t play video games 

image

(via mylokiismine)

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

snazzapplesweet:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

my french teacher kept looking at me like this so I took this without warning him and told him he’d be famous

he demanded a retake bc he wanted u guys to think hes cool


I can’t believe I forgot to mention the fact that when I took this he told me to photoshop some hair on so “my internet friends” would like him
someone make this mans dreams come true


okay

helP

WHEN I SHOWED HIM THIS HE SAID “THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED”

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

snazzapplesweet:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

dammit-jim-im-a-blog:

my french teacher kept looking at me like this so I took this without warning him and told him he’d be famous

he demanded a retake bc he wanted u guys to think hes cool

image

I can’t believe I forgot to mention the fact that when I took this he told me to photoshop some hair on so “my internet friends” would like him

someone make this mans dreams come true

okay

helP

WHEN I SHOWED HIM THIS HE SAID “THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED”

(via coluring)

sixpenceee:

Flemish Giant rabbits are known for their large size. They can be up to 20 pounds and grow up to 32” (80cm) in length. They are actually very gentle creatures, are intelligent and well tempered. (More Information)

(via spookilyreferential)

teseracts:

tom-sits-like-a-whore:

i’ll bet you a substantial amount of money that the Yale scientists were all dudes.

(Source: holybatshitrobin, via darkdaysbrightnights)

black-gate:

cait-space:

wholockednatural-13:

xflowerofcarnagex:

An alternate universe where Bruce Wayne died instead of his parents. Causing his father Thomas Wayne to become Batman and his mother Martha to go insane and become the Joker.

THIS IS SO CRAZY 

HOLY FUCK

Whaaaaat

Flashpoint!

(via mylokiismine)